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Archive for the ‘Love’ Category

Some Hard Things You Need to Hear

The list below is a highlight of some advices I’ve ever been given. Some hard things I remind myself of often … some hard things we all need to hear sometimes.

  1. When you hear only what you want to hear, you’re not really listening.  Listen to what you don’t want to hear too.  That’s how you grow.
  2. Fantasizing about other times and places can be dangerous.  Don’t cling so tightly to the past, or dream so fervently about the future, that you miss out on the real value and beauty that is here and now.  Don’t live entirely in your head.  Don’t miss your life!
  3. You often waste your time waiting for the ideal path to appear.  But it never does.  Because you forget that paths are made by walking, not waiting.
  4. You will never feel as confident as you want to feel.  Stop believing that you should feel more confident before you take the next step.  Taking the next step is what builds your confidence.
  5. Distractions will get the best of you if you let them.  Study your routines, figure out where your time goes, and remove distractions.  You become a true master of your life when you learn how to master your focus—where your attention goes.
  6. There’s a big difference between empty fatigue and gratifying exhaustion.  Know the difference.  Life is too short.  Invest in the activities (and relationships) you deeply care about.  Value what you give your energy to.  Focus on what matters and let go of what does not.
  7. Self-neglect is super common.  Realize this!  Your needs matter.  Do NOT ignore them.  At times you have to do what’s best for you and your life, not just what’s best for everyone else.  There’s absolutely nothing selfish about self-care and self-love.  We can’t give what we don’t have.  Enrich your life and you’ll be life-giving to others, too.
  8. You don’t give yourself enough credit sometimes.  Remember that time you thought you couldn’t make it through?  You did, and you’ll do it again.  Don’t let your challenges get the best of you.  Appreciate how far you’ve come. You’ve been through a lot, but you’ve grown a lot too.  Give yourself credit for your resilience.
  9. Your response is always more powerful than your circumstance.  A tiny part of your life is decided by completely uncontrollable circumstances, while the vast majority of your life is decided by your responses.  Where you ultimately end up is heavily dependent on how you play the hands you’ve been dealt.
  10. Everything gets a bit uncomfortable when it’s time to change.  That’s just a part of the growth process.  Things will get better.  Be patient.
  11. Patience is not about waiting.  Patience is the ability to keep a positive, focused attitude while working hard to move your life forward.
  12. New, good habits don’t form overnight.  It takes roughly 66 days to form a habit.  So for the next nine weeks, look at the bright side of your life, and you will rewire your brain.  Then apply this same principle to other areas of your life. 
  13. Mental strength is incredibly important, and easily overlooked.  Go to environments that expand your mind.  Spend time with people who truly inspire you.  Read books.  Learn.  Grow.  Get better.  Your life is your choice.
  14. Old patterns are hard to break.  Be aware.  Act consciously and consistently.  Don’t fall back into your old patterns.  Toxic habits and behaviors always try to sneak back in when you’re doing better.  Stay focused.
  15. Sometimes it’s better to let go without closure.  Actions and behavior speak volumes.  Trust the signs you were given and gracefully press on.
  16. If you always play the victim, you will always be treated like one.  Life isn’t fair.  But you don’t have to let the past define your future.  Try to take life day by day and be grateful for the little things.  Don’t get caught up in what you can’t control.
  17. Life doesn’t always give you the circumstances you want.  Life gives you the circumstances you need … to learn, to grow, and to fall in love.
  18. When you really pay attention, everyone and everything is your teacher.  Take time to observe and listen.  Take time to learn something new.
  19. No one wins at chess by only moving forward.  Sometimes you have to move backward to put yourself in a position to win.  This is a perfect metaphor for life.
  20. Your hardest challenges will teach you your best lessons.  There is an opportunity in every difficult situation to understand yourself more deeply, and also to improve your life.  Take one small step at a time.
  21. The vast majority of your stress is self-inflicted.  And the most powerful weapon you have against stress is your ability to choose one thought over another.  Learn to manage your thoughts, before your thoughts manage you.
  22. Your mind will forever produce negative thoughts.  So the goal isn’t to get rid of all your negative thoughts.  That’s impossible.  The goal is to change your response to them.  In fact, the strongest sign of your inner growth is realizing you’re no longer worried, stressed or pained by the things that once used to drain you.
  23. Calmness is a superpower.  The ability to not overreact or take things personally keeps your mind clear and your heart at peace.  Once you begin to value your inner peace over your need to react and be right, you will in fact experience more inner peace, and happiness.
  24. You are holding on to things that hold you back.  When things aren’t adding up in your life, begin subtracting.  Life gets a lot simpler when you clear the clutter that makes it complicated.  Not everything and everyone you lose is a loss.
  25. “Busy” is mostly just an excuse.  In a world with so much noise and clutter, you must make room to hear yourself and others.  Embrace silence and space.  Breathe and listen.  Be where you are.  You’re where you’re supposed to be at this very moment.  Every step and experience is necessary, and can be enhanced with your presence.
  26. You ignore your inner voice too often.  Give yourself the space to listen to your own voice—your own soul.  Too many of us listen to the noise of the world and get lost in the crowd.
  27. You often seek validation from the wrong sources.  You will never find your worth in another human being—you will find it in yourself, and then you will attract those who are worthy of your energy.  So stop waiting for others to tell you how impressive you are.  Impress yourself.  Show yourself that you can grow and get better.  It’s never about competing with others.  In the end, it’s just you vs. you.
  28. Popularity is irrelevant.  Forget popularity.  Just do your thing with passion, humility, and honesty.  Do what you do, not for an applause, but because it’s what’s right.  Many of the kindest gestures you’ll ever make, and the most important things you’ll ever do, will never be seen publicly.  Do them anyway.
  29. You have been impressed with some people for the wrong reasons.  Be less impressed by money, titles, degrees, and looks.  Be more impressed by generosity, integrity, humility, and kindness.
  30. People will not always tell you how they feel about you.  But they will always show you.  Pay close attention.
  31. Your expectations of others cause you unnecessary pain.  Don’t lower your standards, but do remember that removing your expectations of others is the best way to avoid being disappointed by them.
  32. You will end up heartbroken if you expect people will always do for you as you do for them.  Not everyone has the same heart as you.
  33. Life is too short to argue and fight.  Remember to be selective in your battles.  Peace can feel better than being right.  You don’t need to attend every argument you’re invited to.  Count your blessings, value the people who matter, and move on from the drama with your head held high.
  34. You will gradually attract people that think and behave like you.  If you want to be surrounded by positive people, you need to be positive too.  And the opposite is also true.  So do your best to surround yourself with people who push you to be your best.  Less drama—less mess.  Just higher vibrations and intentions.
  35. You need to learn to be more human again (we all do).  Don’t avoid eye contact.  Don’t hide behind gadgets.  Smile today.  Ask about people’s stories.  Listen. 
  36. Sometimes you subconsciously dehumanize people you disagree with.  Be careful.  In our self-righteousness, we can easily become the very things we dislike in others.  Ultimately, the way we treat people we disagree with is a report card on what we’ve learned about love and compassion.  Every single person you meet is afraid of something, loves something, and has lost something.  Know this.  Respect this.  And be extra kind.
  37. “Bad” people can change for the better.  If somebody is working on themselves and changing for the better, it’s unnecessary to keep bringing up their past.  People can change and grow.
  38. Forgiveness is necessary for personal peace.  Forgive others, not because they absolutely deserve forgiveness, but because you absolutely deserve peace.  Free yourself of the burden of being an eternal victim.
  39. Life will take things from you, and give things to you, gradually and continuously.  It’s funny how we outgrow what we once thought we couldn’t live without, and then we fall in love with what we didn’t even know we wanted.  Do your best to embrace life’s uncertainties.  Some of the best chapters in your life won’t have a title you feel fully comfortable with until later.
  40. Everything you have right now is in the process of changing again.  Look around, and be thankful for your life right now.  For your health, your family, your friends, and your home.  Nothing lasts forever.

Which point above resonates the most with you right now?

Mantras for NOT Taking Things Personally

Like you, I’m only human, and I sometimes still take things personally when I’m in the heat of the moment.  So, I’ve implemented a simple strategy to support the practice of watching my response.  In a nutshell, I proactively remind myself NOT to take things personally.  Anytime I catch myself doing so, I pause and read a few of the following mantras to myself.  Then I take some fresh deep breaths…

  1. You can’t take things too personally, even if it seems personal.  Rarely do people do things because of you.  They do things because of them.
  2. You may not be able control all the things people say and do to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them.
  3. There is a huge amount of freedom that comes to you when you detach from other people’s beliefs and behaviors.  The way people treat you is their problem, how you react is yours. 
  4. Take constructive criticism seriously, but not personally.  Listen, and then operate with your own intuition and wisdom as your guide.
  5. You are GOOD enough, SMART enough, FINE enough, and STRONG enough.  You don’t need other people to validate you – you’re already valuable.
  6. If you truly wish to improve your self-confidence, self-esteem and self-worth, stop allowing other people to be responsible for them.  Stop allowing other people to dominate your emotions. 
  7. All the hardest, coldest people you meet were once as soft as a baby.  And that’s the tragedy of living.  So when people are rude, be kind, be mindful, be your best.  Give those around you the “break” that you hope the world will give you on your own “bad day” and you will never, ever regret it.

Afterthoughts

Finishing up this post, I am reminded of all the senseless hatred and violence we see in our world today.

Please don’t attach yourself to it.

Do your best NOT to take it personally.

Do your best to let it go – to rise above the hate and drama.

Time To Clean Your Closets

 

Walk-in-Closets-Chandelier

Most of us have spent so much time, energy and money on what we wear and how we look that the last thing anyone needs is more fashion advice.

I will however tell you what not to wear if you want more peace and ease in your life.

1. You never again have to wear the guilt of your past.

Guilt and regret about the past aren’t serving your present. In fact, because of that guilt, you aren’t fully enjoying your current life. Whether it is guilt about letting go of something in your closet that you spent too much on, or guilt about a past relationship or anything in between, you have paid enough. You’ve paid with your money, time, attention and emotion. You can stop paying now. Let go, apologize, forgive and choose to live free of guilt and regret.

2. You never again have to wear your pain.

How many times have you tried to shop away your pain? Retail therapy is an expensive way to relieve the pain of boredom, frustration and heart ache and it only delivers temporary relief. You can’t shop your way out of of pain. I tried and it didn’t work. I did learn though that you can shop yourself into a tremendous amount of debt which leads to more pain, and then more shopping.

Instead of wearing your pain, trade shopping for self care. When you are in pain your heart isn’t saying, “Let’s go shopping.” It’s saying, “Please, take care of me.”

3. You never again have to wear the pressure to prove yourself.

I rarely bought clothes because I actually needed more clothes. I had plenty. Instead I purchased clothing to feel a certain way and to be perceived a certain way … to prove myself. I wanted to feel smart, beautiful and loved. I wanted other people to think I was those things too.

I tried to prove who I was by what I wore and by what I accomplished. The problem was that there was always more to prove and eventually I forgot who I was in the process.

If you have to prove yourself to people you love, that isn’t love. If you struggle to prove yourself at work, maybe you aren’t doing the right work. If you don’t believe me, just stop for a while. Stop pushing and proving and wishing that people would see you the way you think you need to be seen to succeed. Instead, let them see you for you. It’s then that you can finally really be you.

4. You never again have to wear your failures.

Failure gets such a bad rap but it’s nothing more than a stepping stone to success. It’s through the failures that we learn new approaches and ways of doing things. You don’t have to feel sad or bad for failing because if you are failing, that means you are trying. If you must wear your failures, wear them with a smile. You earned them and now you are using them to better your life.

5. You never again have to wear goals you’ve outgrown.

Letting go of goals and dreams can be the most challenging of all. As our lives change, we change, and things that seemed so important years ago may slowly fade away. Instead of beating yourself up for not achieving your old goals, focus on your new dreams and develop goals or bucket lists that reflect who you are right now.

Additionally, make sure your goals are your goals. Are they yours or are they goals that you think other people have for you or expect from you. Let go of any that aren’t yours. The difference you will make in the world when you start chasing YOUR dreams and goals will be extraordinary.

6. You never again have to wear everything you think.

Often, our thoughts can weigh us down but thoughts are just thoughts. Some are true and real and some aren’t. When we cling too tightly to believing everything we think, we distance ourselves from the truth. Questioning the truth of my thoughts has prevented me from over reacting in some situations and helped me let go of other things more easily. Once you realize that all of your thoughts aren’t true, they will be much lighter.

7. You never again have to wear other people’s expectations.

Giving myself permission to let go of my need to meet other people’s expectations or to feel any kind of way based on judgements (good or bad) helps me to trust myself and allows me to love my life regardless of outside feedback. I’m not good or bad or right or wrong because of what anyone else thinks. I can’t control what they think and I’m not going to change myself trying.

When you stop wearing the weight of other people’s expectations and judgements, you’ll be more connected to who you are and to what matters to you. When you let go of what other people think, you’ll gain clarity and freedom to enjoy your life.

Now, it’s YOUR turn…

I would love to hear from YOU in the comments section.

TOUGH TRUTHS ABOUT RELATIONSHIPS

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Here are twelve tough truths about great relationships:

A soul mate is really just a loving partner who’s willing to work with you. – To say that one waits a lifetime for their soul mate to come around is a bit of a paradox.  People eventually get tired of waiting, so they take a chance on someone, and by the powers of love and commitment they become soul mates, which takes a lifetime to perfect.

True love is often the most inconvenient kind. – Again, it takes two people who truly, TRULY want to work together, every day, compromises and all, to build something special.  That’s what great relationships are all about – daily teamwork.

There will be lots of little issues. – When we face pain in relationships our first response is often to sever ties rather than to maintain commitment, but the extent to which two people in a relationship can bring up and resolve issues  is a significant sign of the soundness of their relationship.

There will be lots of tough conversations.– The right words won’t always come easy, but when you don’t talk it out there’s a lot of important stuff that ends up not getting said.  Every great couple needs to argue (consciously and mindfully) now and then, just to prove that the relationship is strong enough to survive.  Long-term relationships – the ones that truly matter – are all about weathering the peaks and the valleys.

Conscious, mindful communication is necessary, but takes practice. – You can measure the happiness of an intimate relationship by the number of scars that each partner carries on their tongues, earned from years of biting back angry, unhelpful words.

There will be more honest misunderstandings than you’d like. – When it comes to understanding your partner, deal with them as they are, not how you’d like them to be.

There will be lots of apologies and necessary forgiveness. – Love is living your own life, but sharing it.  It’s forgiveness.  It’s making a million little mistakes with each other and turning them into learning experiences.  Love is patience, optimism, and sometimes it’s a simple kiss when there’s nothing left to say.

Partners can’t force changes in each other.  Instead of trying to change your partner, give them your support and lead by example.  If there’s a specific behavior they have that you’re hoping fades over time, it probably won’t.  If you really need them to change something specific, be honest and put all the cards on the table so your partner knows how you feel and why.  But keep in mind that the best way to love someone is not to change them, but instead to help them reveal the greatest version of themselves.

A great relationship isn’t needy. – In a great relationship, you love each other more than you need each other.

Even the greatest relationship won’t completely fix YOU. – If you’re not happy with yourself, or comfortable with your own truth when entering a relationship, there’s a good chance you’re not ready for that relationship.  Work on loving yourself first.

Some people won’t support your relationship, no matter how great it is. – Great relationships don’t always make sense, especially from the outside.

No relationship lasts forever. – People don’t live forever.  Appreciate what you have with your partner – the loving moments and all the little things.  You’ll never know how much they mean to you until the day they are no longer beside you.  And remember, just because something doesn’t last forever, doesn’t mean it wasn’t worth your while.

Afterthoughts

The bottom line is that all relationships, including the greatest of them all, require patience and effort.  And no relationship will work flawlessly all the time.

Habits of Happy, Healthy Couples

Cute-Couples

It’s important to understand that love is not just about finding the right person; it’s about working with them to create the right relationship.

Do you struggle in your relationship with your significant other from time to time?  Do you wonder if there’s a way to live together more harmoniously?

I’ve been there.

Here are 10 things happy, healthy couples do every day:

1.  They cherish their differences.

Have you noticed a happy couple together?  They aren’t fiercely independent or pathologically dependent.  They’ve struck a healthy medium.

I think of it as interdependence.  They can agree to disagree on the little things.

Sure, they’re aligned on the big things like life goals.  But they don’t feel that they have to like the same music and share a favorite color.  They don’t expect their partner to approve of all their choices.  Each partner stands in his or her own power and respects the other’s opinion.

Each partner is a happy and successful person in his or her own right.

2.  They keep their assumptions in check.

We go into most situations with certain assumptions —based on our life experiences.

Let’s say one partner grew up in a touchy-feely family and the other didn’t.  The one who did grow up in a touchy-feely family is likely to interpret the other’s behavior as distant or indifferent.

The incorrect assumption?  To express affection, we must be touchy-feely.  That assumption right there can wreak havoc in a relationship!

The solution? Be mindful of your underlying assumptions that sabotage your relationship.

So how do you actually do this?  The next time you’re upset with your partner, check in with yourself first.  Ask yourself: “What are the facts and what are my opinions (based on my assumptions) about this situation?”

Fact: He’s not very physically expressive.

Opinion (based on your assumptions): He doesn’t love me as much as I love him.

Now that you’ve separated the facts from your opinion, question your opinion.  Does that opinion help or hurt your relationship?  I find this kind of self-inquiry to be surprisingly powerful.  Try it.

3.  They don’t confuse their spouse with a carnival psychic.

It’s quite common to think of our partner as an extension of ourselves.  It just happens.  We often assume they know what we’re thinking… almost as if he or she lives in our head.

Here’s an example: John loves his wife Alice.  They’ve been married for 8 years.  Alice comes back from an awful day at work and John greets her enthusiastically.

Alice somehow expects John to know she’s had a bad day.  She wants space and finds his enthusiasm annoying.  Meanwhile, John has no idea what’s going through Alice’s mind, and is trying to work out why she’s so cold and distant.

See the problem here?

We often assume our partners live in our heads and then expect them to respond to our un-communicated frustrations.

Not. Going. To. Happen.

Happy, healthy couples have worked this out.  They make a conscious effort to communicate their needs to each other — even if it seems obvious.

Especially when it seems obvious.

4.  They do their best to step into each other’s shoes.

In other words, they are mindful of each other’s unique perspective.

Imagine this: You know your partner had very little sleep last night.  If you are mindful of this, you’ll interpret their abruptness through their lens (not yours): “I’m tired and I’m not myself right now.”

You won’t take things as personally as you otherwise would have.  You’ll realize it has nothing to do with you and won’t feel hurt.  You won’t react with anger.

Conflict averted.

Even better, you’re more likely to be considerate and offer to give them a back rub to take the edge off.  A little empathy driven shift in perspective goes a really long way.

5.  They recognize the value of personal growth.

You know how to tell if something is alive and well?  You look for evidence of growth.

Great relationships usually have partners committed to lifelong learning and growth.  They’re curious about things.  They are keen to learn from the world and from each other.

Because of their love for learning they afford each other the freedom to develop as individuals within the relationship.

I’ve seen quite a lot of unhappiness in relationships caused by one or both partners being clingy.  They don’t want their significant other to change so they don’t have to change themselves.

But here’s the simple truth: Change is a part of the universe and humans are no exception.

If you want to have a successful relationship you’ve got to embrace learning and personal growth with open arms.

6.  They assume the best of intentions.

Life throws a lot of challenges in every couple’s way.  Happy, healthy couples have figured out the solution lies in consciously adopting an optimistic attitude towards each other and the world in general.

In practice, this means they choose to look for good intentions behind each other’s actions rather than assuming the worst.  They build their relationship on this platform of faith in each other.

The result?  Their approach engenders trust and respect — two key cornerstones of a successful relationship.

Cultivating learned optimism gives you an opportunity to ‘set the tone’ in the relationship.  You feed off each other’s energy and can create a bond where the whole is greater than the sum of the parts.

7.  They seek rapport even in moments of conflict.

Smart couples know the importance of mirroring their partner’s feelings by repeating their partner’s words.

“What I heard you say was that you’re very angry and hurt about my having forgotten your birthday.  I’m sorry that I forgot your birthday and I understand that you’re angry and hurt.  I’d feel the same way if I were you.”

By repeating their partner’s exact words and phrases it forces them to empathize deeply.

Honoring each other’s feelings reinforces mutual trust and respect and builds deep understanding.

8.  They figure out a way to reconnect.

They don’t let their daily resentments eat away at the relationship.

Sure, they give each other space when necessary, but then they figure out a way to reconnect with each other — usually via acts of good will and kindness.

A bunch of flowers picked from the garden.  A bit of humor to lighten the mood.  A hug.  Heck, even a smile.  It doesn’t really matter what.  They do something to reconnect and they do it as soon as possible.

9.  They make time to nurture their relationship. (Especially if they have kids!)

Ever seen a couple with kids at the grocery store.  See that look on their faces?  Like they’re about to explode.  That’s cause they are!

Kids can obliterate essential ‘couple time’ — critical to any happy relationship.

Happy, healthy couples know this and they make time to spend exclusively with each other.  Whether this means getting a babysitter and having a date night every week or just having a glass of wine together after the kids have gone to bed.  They make sure it happens.

It’s essential to make time!  I can’t stress it enough.  Don’t do this and it could be years before you really connect with each again — if at all!  And if you eventually do you won’t recognize each other.

So, when was the last time you went out for a planned date with your partner?

10.  They are committed to weathering the peaks and valleys.

I’ve saved the best for last, because this is the most crucial point of them all.

Show me any great couple and I’ll show you two people who are committed to making their relationship work.  No.  Matter.  What.  They put in the effort day in and day out.  They’re willing to have the difficult conversations.  They fight, but they admit to their mistakes and apologize.  They argue, but make the effort to understand the other’s perspective.

Because every healthy relationship needs an argument every now and then… just to prove that it is strong enough to survive.  Long-term relationships, the ones that matter, are all about weathering the peaks and the valleys.

Happy, healthy couples know this, and they persevere.  They don’t give up on each other.  They stick it out.

Afterthoughts

A happy, healthy long-term relationship as I’ve described in this post may be one decision away from you.

And that’s the decision to be that ideal partner you’re looking for in your partner.  In most cases, what you bring into the relationship has a direct impact on what you get out of it.

I believe every one of us is capable of making this decision.

I did.  And so can you.

It won’t be easy.  But it’s well worth it in the end.

Things I Want to Tell My Kids Before They’re Too Cool to Listen

 image source: hair.lovetoknow.com

Here are thing i would like to tell my kids before they are “too cool” to listen to their “old mom and dad who couldn’t possibly understand. ”

  1. Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference. – Don’t base your attitude on how things are.  Choose your attitude so it supports and expresses the way you wish to be.  Frustration and stress come from the way you respond and react, not the circumstance themselves.  Adjust your attitude, and the frustration and stress is gone.
  2. What you experience starts with your perception. – In almost every case, nothing is stopping you… nothing is holding you back but your own thoughts about yourself and “how life is.”  Your perception creates your beliefs.  And your beliefs create your behaviors.  And your behaviors produce your experience.
  3. Let go of the need to complain about life. – Spend your moments actually living its beauty.  Change the phrase “have to” to “get to.”  So many things we complain about are things others wish they had the chance to do. 
  4. Positivity always pays off. – Your thoughts do not end when you finish thinking them.  They continue to echo through your life.  Choose wisely and intentionally.  Be outrageously and unreasonably positive.  Be funny and creative and ridiculous and joyful all at the same time.  Smile as often as possible.  A smile actually changes the vibe of your body.  It alters, physiologically, the chemistry of your being.  It will make you feel better and do better.
  5. Negativity just shortens your life. – Before you waste it on anger, resentment, spite or envy, always think of how precious and irreplaceable your time is.
  6. Worry is the biggest enemy of the present moment. – It does nothing but steal your joy and keep you very busy doing absolutely nothing at all.  When you spend time worrying, you’re simply using your imagination to create things you don’t want.
  7. Don’t run away from things; run toward them. – The best way to move away from something negative is to move toward something positive.
  8. Nothing is as bad as it seems.  Nothing. – There’s a benefit and a blessing hidden in the folds of every experience and every outcome.
  9. Gratitude helps every situation. – How can you transform suffering into joy, and struggle into peace?  GRATITUDE.  Start being grateful for all the problems you do NOT have.
  10. Everything is falling together perfectly, even though it looks as if some things are falling apart. – Trust in life’s process.  Happiness is allowing yourself to be perfectly OK with what is, rather than wishing for and worrying about what is not.  When life is “falling apart,” things could actually be falling together… maybe for the first time.
  11. Change is necessary. – Change is the process of life itself.  In fact, everything is changing every second of our lives.  However good or bad the situation is now, it will change.  That’s one thing you can count on.  So never assume that you’re stuck with the way things are.   Take a breath of fresh air.  The past is long gone.  Focus on what you can do, not on what you could have or should have done.
  12. You are capable of handling far more than you think. – Accept each moment, without judgment or anxiety.  Remind yourself that all is well, and that you can handle whatever comes along.
  13. If youre having problems, thats good. – It means you’re making progress.  The only people with no problems are the ones doing nothing.
  14. It’s takes just as much energy to waste your time as it does to use it wisely. – It is far better to be exhausted from lots of effort and learning, than to be tired of doing absolutely nothing.
  15. There’s a big difference between being busy and being productive. – Don’t confuse motion and progress.  A rocking horse keeps moving but never makes any forward progress.
  16. You cant achieve what you do not attempt. – Everything you achieve comes from something you attempt.  Everything!  Make the attempt.  The path between wanting and having is doing.
  17. The right thing and the easy thing are rarely the same thing. – Do what matters, not just what is convenient.  Do what is fulfilling, not just what is easy.  When faced with a choice, choose the path that strengthens you.  Choose to learn, choose to grow, choose to more fully become who you are.
  18. You can’t be your best without first being yourself. – Be highly effective by being highly authentic.  Take a moment to pause and remember who you are and what you stand for.  Take a moment to reflect on the ideas and principles that have real and lasting meaning in your life.
  19. Meaningful work is important. – You are at your best when you are moving toward a meaningful, positive and ambitious goal.  So never follow goals you’re reluctant to pursue.  Find ones that will keep you awake at night with excitement.
  20. Always realign yourself with your highest priorities. – If you’re being pulled in every direction by forces beyond your control, take time to realign yourself with what you value most in life.  What is important in your life is what you decide is important, and this decision will ultimately create who you are.
  21. Set your sights high. – Make your dreams big, exciting and undeniable.  They’re the ones that will push you forward.  Whatever is beyond your reach right now will not always be beyond your reach.  Keep going.
  22. Miracles happen every day. – If we think that miracles are normal, we will expect them.  And expecting a miracle is the surest way to get one.
  23. If you’re going to do something, do it with enthusiasm and devotion. – Hold nothing back…  In life.  Or love.  Or business.  Or anything at all.  Every morning, ask yourself what is really important and then have the courage to build your day around your answer.
  24. Focused effort pays. – An attitude of “whatever is convenient” won’t accomplish much, ever.  An attitude of “whatever it takes” is impossible to stop.  So remember, effort does not cost you – it pays.  What you invest in effort is never wasted.  Sincere, focused effort always brings something of value – an outcome that teaches you what the next step is.
  25. What you are capable of achieving is heavily based on how much you want it. – When it means enough to you, then you can do it.  When you are willing and committed and persistent, you will get yourself there, every time.
  26. You can always take a small step in the direction of your dreams. – There is absolutely nothing about your present situation that prevents you from following your dreams, one step at a time.  Use each setback, each disappointment as a cue to push on ahead with more determination than ever before.
  27. Set time aside to celebrate your progress at least once a month. – Look at how far you’ve come.  You have made progress.  And now, imagine how far you can go.
  28. Other people’s opinions don’t have to be your reality. – Let the opinions of others inform you, don’t let them limit you.  Learn to value yourself and what you stand for.  Allow yourself to be yourself.  If you don’t want what the world says you should want, have the courage to say so.
  29. Break the rules sometimes. – Don’t break the law, but break the rules.  If all you are doing is following someone else’s rules, then you have not grown, you have only obeyed.
  30. You alone, get to choose what matters and what doesn’t. – The meaning of everything in your life is the meaning you give it.
  31. Listen to your intuition. – When something feels right, that means it is right for you.  When something feels wrong, that means it is wrong for you.  Pay attention to your authentic feelings, and follow where they lead.
  32. Own and embrace your imperfections. – Because once you’ve accepted your flaws, no one can use them against you.
  33. Every mistake is a step forward. – You cannot make a mistake; you can only make a decision that will be your next best step.
  34. Every day is a clean slate. – Don’t you dare give up on Today because of the way things looked Yesterday.  Don’t even think about it.  Every day is a new day to try again.
  35. No moment is wasted when you live it with presence and purpose. – Value and enjoy the journey, even when there are detours along the way.  Appreciate every moment, whatever each moment may bring.  From the genuine appreciation of these little moments will come a remarkable life.
  36. Treat everyone, especially yourself, with kindness and respect. – Treat yourself as the most important person in the world, and treat others as you treat yourself.  Do not miss a single chance – not one single opportunity – to tell someone how wonderful they are, how beautiful they are inside and out.  Live so that people will enjoy your presence when they’re with you, and appreciate you just as much or even more when they’re apart from you.
  37. Accept important apologies you never received. – If you love someone and you want to forgive them, relieve them of the need to apologize to you, for anything.
  38. True love is freedom. – Love lets go.  Let go of expectation, let go of requirements and rules and regulations that you would impose on your loved ones.  The gift of pure love allows you to bless others and accept them without condition, granting them freedom to make their own choices.
  39. Everyone you meet can teach you something important. – In fact, the people who are the most difficult to deal with can also be your most valuable teachers.
  40. No matter how much you know, there’s a whole lot you don’t know. – In almost every situation, a little more willingness to acknowledge that there may be something you do not know could change everything.  Go somewhere new, and countless opportunities suddenly appear.Keep an open mind.

Afterthoughts

Above all, I think the best thing we can do for our kids as they grow is to allow them to do things for themselves, allow them to be strong and responsible, allow them the freedom to experience things on their own terms, allow them to take the bus or the train and learn from life firsthand… allow them to be better people, allow them to believe more in themselves.

A True Picture Story Of Lion & A Baboon (Good Ending)

Photographer Evan Schiller and Lisa Holzwarth were on a game drive in northern Botswana when they encountered a massive group of thirty to forty chaotic baboons charging by them.

It soon became clear that the baboons were startled by a few lions that were chasing them. The lions were roaring while the baboons were screaming. Everything was in complete disarray.

Amazingly, the two photographers were able to capture a stunning interaction that happened in the midst of the mayhem.
A female baboon tried to make a run for it but unfortunately wasn’t lucky. A lioness grabbed it immediately in her jaws.

Little did she know, a baby baboon, less than 1 month old, soon emerged from next to the mother’s body.

Immediately, the scared baby baboon quickly tried to make an escape but it was too weak to climb far. The lioness was surprised and went over to find out what was happening.

Surprisingly, instead of going for the kill, the lioness began to play with the baby baboon.

The baby was showing signs of physical harm and fatigue from the whole ordeal. The lioness picked the baby up in her mouth

Surprisingly, the baby baboon responded. It soon began to hold on to the lioness’ chest and even attempted to suckle.

Suddenly, two male lions arrived to the scene. The lioness immediately showed signs of aggression towards them. Was she defending the new baby she found?

All the while, the father baboon was watching everything from away and waiting for the right time to come for the save. As he descended from the tree, he would test the interest and responses of the lions each time to not draw sudden attention to himself.

He finally made the move and snatched the baby up at the first moment he could! Father baboon saves the day!

Happy ending indeed.

 

40 Amazing Things You Will Never Forget

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Everything happens at exactly the right moment, neither too soon nor too late.  For everything you lose, you gain something else; and for everything you gain, you lose something else.  You don’t have to like it, but it’s just easier if you do.

Every day you can either regret or rejoice; it’s your choice.  When you choose the latter, life opens doors to amazing experiences you will likely remember forever.  Here are 40 such experiences…

 

  1. Flowing and working through life’s great challenges. – No matter what happens, do your best and smile.  You won’t enjoy your life if you don’t enjoy your challenges.  Great challenges make life interesting, and overcoming them makes life meaningful.
  2. The freedom that comes from acceptance. – The secret to happiness and peace is letting every situation be what it is, instead of what you think it should be, and then making the best of it.
  3. Moments of sincere gratitude. – Appreciate life even when it’s not ideal.  Happiness is not the fulfillment of what we wish for, but an appreciation for what we have.  When life gives you every reason to be negative, think of one good reason to be positive.  There’s always something to be grateful for.
  4. The beautiful happenings that made it all worthwhile. – When you can look back on painful events and feel that you were blessed for how you grew, for the love you knew, for the very fact that you did live through those times, then, and only then, can you truly appreciate gratitude’s vital role in the process of letting go.
  5. Walking comfortably in your own shoes. – We are all weird in some way. What sets you apart may seem like a burden, but it’s not.  Most of the time it’s what makes you so incredible.
  6. The moment you start listening to your inner voice, rather than defying it. – Sometimes your mind needs more time to accept what your heart already knows.  Breathe.  Be a witness, not a judge.  Listen to your intuition.
  7. Aligning what you do with who you are. – Make the rest of your life the best of your life.  Create a life that feels good on the inside, not one that just looks good on the outside.
  8. Using your unique ideas, perspectives, and skills to make a difference. – If you desire to make a difference in the world, you must be different from the world, and you must be bold enough to show it.
  9. Designing your own life, your own way. – No matter how you live, someone will be disappointed.  So live a life you are proud of.  Live YOUR truth and be sure YOU aren’t the one who is disappointed in the end.
  10. Working hard on something you love. – Hard work becomes easy when your work becomes your play.  Never underestimate the value of loving what you do.  When we lose ourselves in the things we love, we find ourselves there, too.
  11. Knowing deep down that you gave your dreams a fair chance. – Most of the time the only difference between a dream that came true and one that didn’t, is a person who wouldn’t give up and one who did.
  12. Reflections of your own bravery. – When you’re scared but you take the next step anyway, that’s bravery.
  13. The glory of conquering an old fear. – Fear is a feeling, not a fact.  The best way to gain strength and self-confidence is to do what you are afraid to do.  Dare to stretch yourself.
  14. Being courageous enough to grow and evolve. – It takes courage to grow and become who you really are.  Don’t fear change.  You may lose something good, but you may also gain something great.
  15. The way you feel at the end of highly productive days. – Laziness may appear attractive, but work leads to happiness.  You are what you do, not what you say you’ll do.  Good things don’t come to those who wait; they come to those who work on meaningful goals.
  16. When your patience finally pays off. – Patience is not the ability to wait, but how you act and how hard you are willing to work while you’re waiting for your work to pay off.
  17. Making the impossible possible. – In most cases, impossible is not a fact; it’s an opinion.  Almost anything is possible if you’ve got enough time and enough nerve.
  18. When you have a great reason to be impressed with yourself. – Spend less time impressing others and more time impressing yourself.  Climb a mountain so you can see the world, not so the world can see you.
  19. Engaging deeply in your own journey, drama-free. – Let the tasks of refining, improving, and appreciating your own life keep you so busy that you have no need and no time to criticize others, or engage in their drama.
  20. Standing up for yourself. – Sometimes we suffer, not because of the violence others inflict on us, but because of our own silence.  When someone tries to bully you, stand up for yourself and say, “Not so fast, buddy!  Your delusion of superiority is your problem, not mine.
  21. Relationships that make you a better person. – Know that it’s less important to have more friends and more important to have real ones.  Surround yourself with people who make you better, and cherish every moment of your time together.
  22. Knowing deep down that you truly matter to someone else. – Someday you will be just a memory to some people.  Do your best to be a great one.
  23. True intimate love. – True love is not about how many days, months or years you’ve been with someone.  True love is about how much you actually love each other every day.
  24. Appreciating the beautiful imperfections of another person. – Imperfection is real and beautiful.  It’s how two people accept and deal with the imperfections of their relationship, that make it ideal in the end.
  25. Following through with your promises. – Unless a real commitment is made there are only empty promises and hopes, but no real plans or results.  Remember, commitment means staying loyal and keeping a promise long after the mood you made the promise in has left you.
  26. Giving a struggling soul a little extra leeway. – Don’t be so quick to judge.  The strongest people are not those who show strength in front of us, but those who win battles we know nothing about.
  27. Helping someone who desperately needs your kindness. – Those who are hardest to love often need it the most.  So treat everyone with kindness, even those who are rude.  Give them a chance.
  28. Knowing you did the right thing. – True integrity is doing the right thing, no matter what, even when nobody’s going to know whether you did it or not.
  29. Seeing genuine smile you helped create. – Few things are more satisfying than helping someone else smile a little more than before.
  30. Coming to a loving compromise with someone special. – Sometimes we must choose to be wrong, not because we really are wrong, but because we value our relationship more than our pride.
  31. Moments of mindful presence. – If you’re always racing to the next moment, what happens to the one you’re in?  Stop over thinking and worrying.  Life is too short for that.  Worry and rumination are the worst enemies to living happily in the present.  Take a moment here and there to just be and breathe.
  32. The liberation of letting go. – Letting go of the past is your first step toward happiness.  So finish each day before you begin the next, and build a solid foundation of rest between the two.
  33. The process of growing through failure. – Remember, your failure does not define you, your determination does.  Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, smarter than before.
  34. When the sun finally shines through the dark clouds again. – Don’t give up on yourself.  Keep fighting.  Sometimes you’ve got to go through the worst of times to get the best.
  35. Surprising new beginnings. – Every ending is the beginning of something else.  Every exit is an entry somewhere else.  As long as you are breathing, it’s never too late; every day is a new opportunity.
  36. The nimble feeling of being a beginner. – Allow yourself to be a beginner.  No one starts off being great.  Do the best you can until you know better.  When you know better, do better.
  37. The exhilaration of first time experiences. – You can see or do something a million times, but you can only see or do it for the first time once.  And that makes doing so worth it.  Many of the great times you will remember for a lifetime are the ones when you stepped outside of your comfort zone and tried something new.
  38. Becoming a parent. – Being a mother or father is discovering strengths you didn’t know you had and dealing with fears you never knew existed.
  39. The happiness YOU create for yourself and those you love. – In life, you often have to create your own sunshine.  So read something positive every morning when you wake up, and let it inspire you to do something positive before you go back to sleep at night.  That’s how memorable days are made.
  40. Every moment you are busy living through love. – Today is one of the good ol’ days you’re going to miss someday.  So be sooo busy loving your life and those in it that you have no time for hate, regret or fear.

Your turn…

Truth be told, talking about our problems is our greatest addiction.  Let’s break this negative habit and talk about our joys, our loves, and our victories instead.  So tell me this:

What makes life amazing?  What makes a moment worth remembering?

Leave a comment below and share your thoughts.

Quotes to Help You Let Go and Live

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Letting go doesn’t mean you don’t care about someone or something anymore; it’s just realizing that the only thing you truly have control over is yourself, right here, right now.  It’s a necessary process of adapting to the ever-changing realities of life – leaving behind the past to make way for the present.

Here are 50 quotes gathered from recent entries in our blog archive that will help you let go and live well…

 

  1. As we grow older and wiser, we begin to realize what we need and what we need to leave behind.  Sometimes walking away is a step forward.
  2. You will never achieve what you are capable of if you’re too attached to things you’re supposed to let go of.
  3. Sometimes there are things in our lives that aren’t meant to stay.  Sometimes the changes we don’t want are the changes we need to grow.
  4. Growth and change may be painful sometimes, but nothing in life is as painful as staying stuck where you don’t belong.
  5. The hardest part about growing is letting go of what you were used to, and moving on with something you’re not.
  6. Accept what is, let go of what was and have faith in what could be.
  7. Don’t be afraid of change.  Change happens for a reason.  Roll with it.  It won’t be easy, but it will be worth it.
  8. It’s usually quite hard to let go and move on, but once you do, you’ll feel free and realize it was the best decision you’ve ever made.
  9. Never let your fear decide your future.
  10. Fear doesn’t exist anywhere except in your mind.  It’s difficult to follow your heart, but it’s a tragedy to let the lies of fear stop you.  
  11. You can’t always wait for the perfect moment.  Sometimes you must let go and dare to do it because life is too short to wonder what could have been.
  12. You’re not the same person you were a year ago, a month ago, or a week ago.  You’re always growing.  Experiences don’t stop.  That’s life.
  13. One of the most rewarding moments in life is when you finally find the courage to let go of what you can’t change.
  14. Never force anything.  Give it your best shot, and then let it be.  If it’s meant to be, it will be.  Don’t hold yourself down with things you can’t control.
  15. When you stop expecting people and situations to be perfect, you can start to appreciate them for who and what they are.
  16. Live simply.  Love generously.  Speak truthfully.  Breathe deeply.  Do your best.  Leave everything else to the powers above you.
  17. Giving up and moving on are two very different things.
  18. Moving on doesn’t mean forgetting, it means you choose happiness over hurt.
  19. Giving up doesn’t always mean you’re weak; sometimes it simply means you are strong enough and smart enough to let go and grow.
  20. Stop focusing on how stressed you are and remember how blessed you are.  It could be so much worse.
  21. Whatever is bringing you down, let it GO!  You don’t need that negativity in your life.  Keep calm and be positive.  Good things will happen.
  22. Some people cannot stand that you’re moving on with your life and so they will try to drag your past to catch up with you.  Do not help them by acknowledging their behavior.  Keep moving forward.
  23. No matter how you live, someone will be disappointed.  So just live your truth and be sure YOU aren’t the one who is disappointed in the end.
  24. Love yourself!  Forgive yourself!  Accept yourself!  You are YOU and that’s the beginning and the end – no apologies, no regrets.
  25. You are GOOD enough, SMART enough, FINE enough, and STRONG enough.  You don’t need other people to validate you; you’re already valuable.
  26. One of the most freeing things we learn in life is that we don’t have to like everyone, everyone doesn’t have to like us, and it’s perfectly OK.
  27. Try not to take things other people say about you too personally.  What they think and say is a reflection of them, not you.
  28. If you care too much about what other people think, in a way, you will always be their prisoner.
  29. Sometimes we expect more from others because we’d be willing to do that much for them.  Keep loving.  You’ll learn who’s worth it in the end.
  30. Not everyone will appreciate what you do for them.  You have to figure out who’s worth your attention and who’s just taking advantage of you.
  31. Saying yes to happiness means learning to say no to the people and things that hurt you.  Be wise enough to walk away from the negativity.
  32. What you allow is what will continue.  It’s better to be lonely than allow negative people and their opinions derail you from your destiny.
  33. If you feel like your ship is sinking, it might be a good time to throw out the stuff that’s been weighing it down.  Let go of people who bring you down, and surround yourself with those who bring out the best in you.
  34. Just because someone has been in your life for many years, doesn’t mean there shouldn’t be a point at which you finally decide to let go.
  35. One of the most difficult tasks in life is removing someone from your heart.
  36. You have to understand that people come and people go.  That’s life.  Stop holding on to those who have let go of you long ago.
  37. Sometimes we don’t forgive people because they deserve it.  We forgive them because they need it, because we need it, and because we cannot let go and move forward without it.
  38. The first to apologize is the bravest.  The first to forgive is the strongest.  The first to move forward is the happiest.
  39. Don’t cry over the past, it’s gone.  Don’t stress about the future, it hasn’t arrived.  Do your best to live in the NOW and make it beautiful.  
  40. Be wise enough to let go when you should and strong enough to hold on when you must.
  41. Don’t let dumb little things break your happiness.  True wealth is the ability to experience and appreciate each moment for what it’s worth.
  42. Life is too short to spend at war with yourself.  Practice acceptance and forgiveness.  Letting go of yesterday’s troubles is your first step towards happiness today.
  43. Worry gives small things a big shadow.  In the end, you can either focus on what’s tearing you apart, or what’s holding you together.
  44. Old worries are down payments on problems you may never have.  Let them go.  Today is a NEW beginning; take a deep breath and START AGAIN.
  45. Smile, even when it feels like things are falling apart.  Smiling doesn’t always mean you’re happy; sometimes it simply means you’re strong.
  46. There comes a time when you have to stop thinking about your mistakes and move on.  No regrets in life – just lessons that show you the way.
  47. Remember the good times, be strong during tough times, love always, laugh often, live honestly, and be thankful for each new day.
  48. You can’t let one bad moment spoil a bunch of good ones.  Don’t let the silly little dramas of each day get you down.
  49. If you are diligent and patient, everything you truly need in your life will come to you at the right time.
  50. Everything will fall into place eventually.  Until then, learn what you can, laugh often, live for the moments, and know it’s all worthwhile.

Your turn…

What’s your favorite quote or personal saying that has helped you let go and live well?  Please share it with us by leaving a reply below.

6 Things Couples Should Stop Doing

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If your relationship with your partner doesn’t feel as healthy and happy as it once did, there’s a good chance you both need to STOP…

1.  Being too busy to be present with each other.

The best gift you can give someone you love is the purity of your full presence.  Presence is complete awareness, or paying full attention to “the now.”  If you do not find at least some amount of presence in the moments you share with your partner, it is impossible to listen, speak, compromise, or otherwise connect with them on a meaningful level.

To cultivate your presence, all you need to do is sit quietly for as long as you desire and put your full attention on your breath – thinking only of what each inhale and exhale feels like.  Don’t judge or resist your inner-workings.  Simply accept and breathe.  Practice this a few times a day, and it will start to feel more natural.  This way, when you are in the thick of a deep conversation with your partner, you can access that presence and listen without judgment or impatience, speak with clarity, and learn to fully connect and compromise.

Bottom line:  Be Present.  Give your partner your full attention.  Let them see their own beauty in your eyes.  Let them find their own voice through your listening ears.  Help them discover their own greatness in your presence.

2.  Feeling too comfortable to compliment each other.

The secret to a healthy, lasting relationship is not about how many days, months, or years you’ve been together, it’s about how much you truly love each other every day.  You must directly express this love through your words and actions.  It seems like such a small thing, but in our busy lives we often forget that a kind word, a helping hand, or just a smile and a quick “thank you” can create a bright spot in your partner’s life.

Relationships last a lifetime only when two people make a choice to keep it and work for it.  Tell your partner you love them every night, and prove it every day.  These acts of love don’t need to be extravagant; they just need to be true.

Also, acknowledging and appreciating each other’s daily victories is one of the most loving things two people can do for each other.  So before going to bed every night, take a moment to openly discuss and appreciate three things you each accomplished during the day, no matter how small.  Compliment each other and celebrate together.  What we focus on expands.  What we appreciate, appreciates in value.

3.  Resisting compromise.

Good relationships don’t just happen, and they aren’t built solely on a foundation of convenience.  They take time, patience, effort, and two people who want to be together and are willing to meet in the middle.  When there’s a disagreement, they work out a solution that works for both parties – a compromise, rather than a need for the other person to change or completely give in.

Ultimately, love is when another person’s happiness is equally as important as your own.  It’s not only about romance, candle-lit diners and walking hand in hand; it’s about a lifetime of commitment and cooperation.  Two people don’t stay in love because they sleep in the same bed, but because they share the same foundation of honesty, trust, and respect.  

4.  Wanting to be right.

When it comes to closest relationships, you don’t always have to be right, you just have to not be too worried about being wrong.  Ask yourself, “Does it really matter?”  Oftentimes it’s far better to be kind than to be right.

Express your opinions freely and politely with your partner, remembering that if your purpose is to ridicule or prove them wrong, it will only bring bitterness into your relationship.  Respecting their opinion, without judging or jumping to conclusions, always carries more weight than simply being right.

Bottom line:  Life is so much better when you focus on being happy together, rather than worrying about who is more right as an individual.

5.  Hiding personal flaws and problems from each other.

You attract a person by the qualities you show them, you keep them around based on the qualities you truly possess.  Problems and flaws are a part of everyone’s life.  If you try to hide them, you don’t give the person who loves you a chance to truly know you and love you fully.

As flawed as you might be, as out of place as you sometimes feel, and as lacking as you believe you are, you don’t have to hide the imperfect pieces of yourself from your partner.  They see your flaws as features that make you interesting, and they see your problems simply as a sign that you’re human too.

By hiding things from your partner, you allow small problems to escalate and dominate both your life and your relationship.  If you make a mistake, it might be irritating, but don’t bury it inside you.  Be open about it, address it, and move on.  Our problems are really our blessings if we use them to grow stronger, both as individuals and as couples.

6.  Trying to get even, as a replacement to forgiveness.

Getting even doesn’t help a relationship heal.  If you’re feeling pain, don’t take action that creates even more pain.  Don’t try to cover darkness with darkness.  Find the light.  Act out of love.  Do something that will enable you to move forward towards a more fulfilling reality.

If your partner makes a mistake that hurts you, and you want your relationship grow beyond it, you have to start with forgiveness.  Without it, the potential for long-term happiness in a relationship is impossible.

You don’t forgive your partner because you’re weak; you forgive them because you’re strong enough to know that human beings make mistakes.  Forgiveness is giving up your craving to hurt them for hurting you.  It doesn’t mean you’re erasing the past, or forgetting what happened.  It means you’re letting go of the resentment and pain, and instead choosing to learn from the incident and move forward with your life… and hopefully move forward with your relationship too.

Afterthoughts

The greatest relationships take a great deal of work.  They don’t just happen, or maintain themselves.  They thrive only when two people make an effort and take the risk of sharing what it is that’s going on in their heads and hearts.

Keep in mind that every couple has ups and downs, every couple argues, and that’s the way it should be – you’re a partnership, and partnerships can’t function without regular communication and compromise.  When you don’t talk it out, there’s a lot of important stuff that ends up not getting said.

And, above all, remember that it’s not all about you.  There is greatness in doing something you dislike for the sake of someone you love.

Your turn…

What relationship mistakes would you add to this post?  What should every couple stop doing to each other?  Leave a comment below and share your thoughts with us.

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